WTF? Wednesday

Yes, I know I should be ashamed for taking photos while driving, but this HAD to be documented. Please click on the picture to see it larger — then notice what is written on the back of the tank.

“Haulin’ Liquid Chicken” WTF is that? Seriously. LIQUID chicken? So of course I googled it and came across all kinds of interesting things. There’s a band named Liquid Chicken. Urban Dictionary has a listing for “liquid chicken” (eggs). There are several strange videos on YouTube that reference liquid chicken products. Knorr makes a bottled liquid chicken flavor. There’s a liquid chicken fertilizer.

There were also lots of pictures and blog posts about similar trucks (but not this one, so it’s scary that there is a fleet of Liquid Chicken trucks). The thing that threw me off was that all of their photos showed the word “Inedible” somewhere. Mine doesn’t. So I guess it was edible liquid chicken? After visiting several blogs, there still doesn’t seem to be an answer for what is in that tanker.

On a recent trip to Sam’s Club, I came across this gem.

Anti-Money Butt? WTF is monkey butt?

The thing that really intrigued me was the “For Butt Busting Activities” part on the box. So, back to Google to find their website. Here is what they describe as butt-busting activities … truck driving, motorcycling, bicycling, horse back riding, and extreme sports. Any other activities that give you monkey butt?

WTF? Wednesday

I had a few awesome WTF? pictures to share today, but they will have to wait, as we have more tooth drama to discuss.

Anabella had a lose tooth last night – right next to the other tooth she lost on the bottom. You remember that one. The one that just disappeared at school. The one that never made it home. The one that wasn’t worthy of a note. The first tooth lost that I will never see.

Well, she wakes up this morning and the second tooth has fallen out. But it is no where to be found. Not in the bed, not on the floor. I’m guessing she swallowed it in her sleep?


Seriously, I am so pissed about this. We are totally being screwed out of the whole tooth fairy experience. So I guess the tooth fairy is going to come tonight anyway. And leave a note? What do I do?

If I hear “mommy” one more time …

Dan was out of town last week, and now I know why I can never get divorced — my children are quite a handful! No time to blog, no time to sleep. I was lucky to get a shower every day.

Anabella came down with strep throat on Monday (the day after he left), and that was a good indication on how the rest of my week was going to go. It’s not that I can’t handle being alone with my own kids, it’s just non-stop with those two. And when it’s just me, I’m the only cook, waiter, referee, maid, bather/hair washer, boo-boo kisser, retriever/finder of things, etc. And it didn’t help that Anabella is the World’s Most Demanding Patient.

“Mommy, I need more ice.”
“Mommy, can you re-cover me?”
“Mommy, please fast forward.”
“Mommy, my arm hurts.”
“Mommy, I don’t want Scarlett to talk to me.”

And for two nights, these demands went on all through the night, in bed, next to me, like a little drill sergeant.

On Wednesday, I decided to play a fun game (because that’s what you do when you have no adults to talk to!) and count how many times Anabella and Scarlett said “mommy.” Between 6 and 8:45 p.m. the word “mommy” was spoken, screamed or cried 79 times. 79!

Luckily, Dan let me have lots of alone and nap time over the weekend, so I have mostly recovered from the ordeal and can get things back on track here and IRL.

See you tomorrow for WTF? Wednesday!

WTF? Wednesday

Last week our friend Omar sent me a tweet that said “in a training class taught by someone from Houston. ‘Everyone drives angry in Houston.'” Being the Queen of Road Rage, I can say that is totally true.

But today on my commute in, my fellow drivers were more SCARY than angry. WTF is up with these people? (click the photos to get a better view)

Mr. Not one, but two grim reapers on my truck.

Ms. You won’t notice these are bullet holes in my door if I cover them with duct tape, right?

Very important WTF? Wednesday Update

On chips …

I received an email from a coworker today titled “You Win!” And while I probably can’t take credit, apparently Sun Chips is retiring the MOST LOUD AND ANNOYING bag ever. Hooray! Don’t worry environment, they are going back to the drawing board on the compostable bag and shooting for something that doesn’t make you want to stab yourself in the ears.

Here’s a link to the article. Apparently the 40,000 people complaining on Facebook had something to do with their decision too.

And while we are talking about chips — do not buy these Voodoo Gumbo chips from Zapp’s.

I ate this entire bag in two days. They are the best. thing. ever.

All my crushes

Several of my celebrity crushes were mingling on TV last week. First, Jon Stewart was on David Letterman (I have lots of love for both of them) – and they were totally hysterical together, as I would have guessed. (Side note: Poor Dan tried to get some “quality” time with me during the interview and I was all like “But JON STEWART is on DAVID LETTERMAN – I have to watch this.”) Later in the week, Justin Timberlake was on Jon Stewart. Another double dip of happiness for me.

Then I started thinking, I have really weird taste. I mean put those three up next to each other and it’s definitely a mixed bag. Especially when you add in some of my others, like Tom Colicchio and Dwayne Johnson.

Who do you all crush on?