A warning to future 40 year olds

Just an FYI – Black icing does the following to teeth, tongues, fingers, etc.

Who knew black icing was so menacing?
Being the person responsible for bringing this cake, I wish I could say I felt bad, but I didn’t. It was f*cking hysterical to see everyone smile with stained black teeth. Kim even had black icing stains on her fingers (from doling out cake) and her arm (not sure how that happened). She looked like she had been fingerprinted earlier in the day!

All those fire extinguisher jokes are actually true
I am also not sorry for putting 40 candles on the cake, instead of just a nice “4” and a “0.” It was quite a blaze! (Seriously. I burned myself several times trying to light all those damn candles.)

So, KB is probably just counting the days until my 40th birthday, when I am sure she will “return the favor.”

— The B.S. Cafe is now serving chocolate cake with toxic black icing. But heck, we’re all old so does it really matter anymore?

2 thoughts on “A warning to future 40 year olds

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