Things That Are Cool About Going Back To Work

1. Not only do I get to use the restroom alone and without being screamed at by the 10-month-old hellion who is locked behind the gate, I also get to pick my flush.

“UP for #1” or “DOWN for #2”. Who knew that #1 and #2 were now the official, workplace terminology?!

And the bonus is that I don’t have to teeter unsteadily on one heel to flush with my foot, because the handle is “coated to protect against germs.” Hooray!