Dear “DNR European Café” owner:

I’ve been very hesitant to eat at your establishment, because here in the U.S. “DNR” stands for “Do Not Resuscitate.”

In that context, your tag line seems a little ominous, don’t you think? I’m here for lunch, not a toe tag.

Next time, you might want to run your name choices by a few locals before having the fancy sign made.

— The B.S. Café is now serving deadly yummy sandwiches from the DNR Café. Enjoy.

P.S. What’s Scarlett sitting on today? (Notice the sunglasses. You don’t want to be caught without them in a laundry basket!)