I was keeping my mind stimulated the other night by reading the grocery receipt, when I stumbled upon a very strange purchase.
Could it be some new gel/foam/lubricant/happy pill that will keep my husband’s Mr. How Do You Do “preserved” while we endure the doctor mandated sexual hiatus for the remaining 3 weeks?? I rummaged through the cabinets trying to figure out what he bought for his penis, when I finally came across the DICKINSON’S Strawberry Preserves in the pantry (notice that just three items down, the Dickinson’s Pumpkin Butter is abbreviated quite differently).
So for my next job, I want to be the person who decides what abbreviations go on the receipts at the grocery store. (The current guy seems like he might be like Brad Pitt in Fight Club…getting a kick from sneaking in one frame of porn into the kid movies.) Of course, I would be less sexual/pornographic and more humorous/sarcastic. Kind of like when Omar bought a “boy toy” at Burger King!